3. 

    

    

   I like to think that .... Life itself is the first reason why we are born.
   Life is exciting, beautiful, meaningful, inspiring, powerful, bright, creative, energizing, free, happy, joyful, friendly, mindful, full of love… Yet, there is this feeling of potential … danger … of … losing it all, danger of never having it; the big “what if”; the embarrassment, the pain, the vulnerability, the effort, the more pain, the trade off, the work need to invest first in order to see the bright side and keep it.
   
   And yes, life is in itself life threatening. Anything could seize our life. That is why we have all those protective sentences - “Be careful!” “Don’t climb that tree, you might fall!” “Put yourself a jacket, you might get ill!*”Don’t do that (job change, marriage, investment), that might be a huge mistake!”,”Don’t say that (truth), it will break their heart!”…. We nurture a culture that keeps us alive but not truly lively. And less honesty, please. Yet, the more life we get, the more lively and magical it gets. More of life is also more “danger” and getting things come out of control.
   
   So, the question is often, am I brave enough for my life; am I brave enough to be truly alive and handle it? It is so much easier for us to hide from life so that it does not take notice of us and burden us with its overwhelming liveliness.
   
   Yes, hiding takes so much energy, it costs so much pleasure and joy, and freedom. It makes the fear grow bigger. “Tomorrow.” “I will do it next month.” “I will decide tomorrow.” “I will call later.” “I will book that trip in January” “I will think about that goal after Christmas” “I will spend more time with the family during the holiday” “I will nourish the relationship when I have more time” “I will change my job when I get more experienced”… “Not now.”, “I am too busy now.”…
   
   But this dangerous, endeavoring, thrilling, threatening life out there is … running more and more out of … time.
   So, what about Now! The best time of the day is now, the only free time slot where a change can start is … tomorrow, later, next year now! 
    
   “I am tired.” “It is already so late.” “I worked so much today.” “I can’t concentrate now.” “I need rest.” “I need a holiday.” “I have a demanding job.” “I have to take care of the children.” “I have a depression.” “I am traumatized and actually, it is my parents’ fault for the situation I am in.” “It is the country - politicians are so corrupt and selfish.” “If only I was born rich and beautiful.” “If only my lips were bigger and my hips were thinner.” “It is the alcohol.” “It is my controlling mistrusting wife.” It is my oppressive, passive-aggressive husband.” … These can continue for so many lifetimes.
   
   The truth is - we don’t know where to start. There is so much change needed, so much to declutter; it looks so overwhelming. And a lost cause from the start…Why really bother?
   Now, think of the Chosen Ones - life’s favourites. Life’s dear children. We saw them on TV. We read their stories in the big old books. We see them on stage during the conferences. And there is is this victimizing voice telling us: “They were born ingenious.” “They were beautiful from the start.” “They did not go through so many traumas, and harassment, and pain.” “They had great parents who oriented them and helped them from the start.” “He was born lucky.” …
   Hmmm, but it is not really fitting … their autobiography said “He was beaten by his drunk father and then bullied by his classmates. Then he spent time in prison.” “He did so poor at school and dyslexia was his smallest problem.” It is not fitting, she mentioned at an interview that “She was sexually assaulted. Multiple times. Got pregnant with 12.” “He was born during wartime, was a refugee.”  Truth is, they really had to work their a.. out. They really sweat, and had fears, and depressions, and pain…until they were able to change their thinking, get some goals, make a bigger plan of it, moved ahead. Because they wanted to be alive during their lifetime. The rest is bravery, life’s magic, open doors, taken chances. But it all started in the magic of a now.
   
   So what is the next best excuse? What are our explanations; why not now? We don’t know how to structure it? We don’t have anybody to believe in us and support us, cheer us up, see in us what we are not able to see?
   
   Why don’t we try “Working Out Loud” by John Stepper? Why don’t I join a WOL circle? Too strange? We don’t feel like? Well, there are bajillion of other ways. Find the way, find the tools. Find the people who will support. Start living. Do that scary thing. Do it twice. Celebrate yourself. Smile. Tell yourself good things. Smile. Breath in, breath out. Motivate yourself. Motivate and celebrate the others. Tell them something nice. Once again. Thank them, thank life, thank your parents, thank your wife, your husband, thank God. Repeat. Gratitude changes our attitude. Do that run. Make that calls. Talk that talks. Jump that jumps. Write that words. Work that work. Live that life. Now!
   
   
   *Experiments have been done on 1000 people showing that catching a cold is virtually impossible unless there are pathogen viruses, bacteria or fungi. It is not being wet, in the cold, with wet hair…